You wear white, and I'll wear out the words, "I love you," and "you're beautiful"

Very recently, I've had several people talk about how worthless marriage is, how it's pointless, and how "love" is just a way for women to express their feelings.

Ugh.

As I am 99.7% sure that this is my future vocation (regardless of that actually), I am obviously offended. This is a beautiful goal that I am working towards someday in the most likely very distant future. It. Is. Beautiful. And important.

It frustrates me that people look at the divorce rate alone when they decide how to value marriage. Marriage is beautiful! It's just that more often than not, couples go into it because they are infatuated with each other and marriage is the logical next step. Couples are so high on each other that they overlook that marriage is a commitment, that love is a verb and not just a fuzzy feeling.

Dear confused society: the fuzzy feelings are nice, yeah, but fuzzy feelings can't sustain a person. They won't be there every moment of every day. And you know what? That's ok. We're all broken fallen human beings. We frustrate each other. We fail each other. We get into arguments. Does that mean we love each other any less? Why do some married couples see a fight as the end of the world? Have they never gotten into with friends? With family? Just as maintaining these relationships in a healthy manner requires WORK and sacrifice, so does marriage! Tada!

The biggest reason for the absurd divorce rate: people have no idea what they're getting into when they get married. It's a fact. They jump into the fuzzy feelings... and it ends up they don't even know their spouse to begin with. And that's really sad. I know that we're all just searching to be loved. Love is at the very core of who we are. We ache to know that we're worth something and have that validated in the eyes of another.

Dear broken world: you are so hard to live in sometimes. Love is not always evident. We need more of it. More of the verb. Less of the misconception that pleasant feelings are enough to sustain us, no matter how lovely they may seem.

...random marriage rant over... I am very tired.

God love your soul and your achin bones

Currently listening to "All Fall Down" by OneRepublic. I'm a little bit infatuated with them. And this song.

"If ever your world starts crashin' down, whenever your world starts crashin' down...that's where you'll find me."

In some ways, I feel like God's saying, "Hey, I'm here! I know you're going to fall down. You know you're going to fall down sometimes... as everyone does, but I will always be here to pick you up."

I think about that, I know it's true, and though I hate depending on emotional consolation, sometimes I wish I had a more tangible knowledge of it... Again, it's about my ability, or lack thereof, of ownership of some truths. Lame. I'm lame. I know.

And then I remind myself that God works through others. They're the tangible truth. My friends are the tangible evidence that He's there. Yes, as humans, we fail each other, but the fact that they have been put in my life and put up with my woes, my worries, my complaints, and my sorrows is evidence of a Love greater than my comprehension, is evidence that Love is *present* Who knew? Ok, so everyone else did, but my feeble little self forgets sometimes... (in experience, though not in intellect...I haven't completely lost my way... just mildly)

I was reminded, very strongly, that even when I am too dense to see every way God is there for me, He has my lovely friends speak Love to me. These friends who visit me when I'm broken, make me laugh about stupid things and cast my worries aside, give me more hugs than most people would even want...they give a face to Love. They remind me that I *do* know and recognize Love.

God has no hands and feet but ours... I know I don't always use them as I ought, but I can say that I'm very grateful for all those who do.

"God love your soul and your achin' bones. Take a breath, take a step, meet me down below. Everyone's the same, our fingers to our toes. We just can't get it right, but we're on the road. Whenever your world starts crashin down...that's when you'll find me."

I am constantly hit with the reality that we are, in essence, the same. No, we  may never judge another's journey by our own, as we really don't know all the roads they've traveled, but the truth is, they know what it is to be weather-beaten and weary, they've seen the sunshine and the shade, and they've stumbled off the path. Whether for the sake of adventure or accident...  it doesn't matter. We're all just trying to make it. We're all made with from the same Goodness for the same Love. We've all been given the tools we need to make it through. We haven't all been given the same tools. That's kind of why we have to work together, yeah? We're not meant to be alone. And when we're too dense to be acutely aware of God's hand holding ours, we have to show it to each other. And we do it in ways so small we don't even notice... It's funny to me.

Today, I am very grateful for the beautiful souls in my life. They bring immeasurable light to whatever darkness I come across.

Thanks for the love, God.

Write you a letter, but it's better that you hear me

Happy Thanksgiving!

Yeah, this is one of those slightly cheesy Thanksgiving posts...so what? You know I'm going to ramble a bit before I get to the really cheesy stuff, so I think it's a fair trade off?

I just wanted to take this opportunity to say: thank you.

God knows I'm a mess and a half... I wouldn't be anywhere close to functioning if it weren't for the amazing family and friends I've been blessed with. Thank you.

This week has been a weird one. It's been one of those clearing through all of the crap in the basement/attic and choking on the dust kind of weeks. For a normal human being, that's obnoxious enough, but for an allergy-induced asthmatic such as myself, it's just a little bit more uncomfortable. (and yes, I'm still being figurative...just weird...go figure). But I think I'm starting to see more of the big picture... Maybe... and that's something that is very good for me.

Anywho...fall cleaning (I'm a little backwards, and I like fall better)...working through life... trying to figure it out...awkward and uncomfortable (as I often am)... I am spoiled and blessed. God's pretty good like that.

As always, through every trial, there remains a million little reminders that I am loved. (and if this mess of a lady is so well loved, you can bet that you are pretty darn loved as well. Because you are. So. Loved.)

I'm starting  to see that (believe it or not) I am making at least a minuscule difference in my workplace. (which is huge for me because most of the time I feel like I'm a million years behind where I need to be to do a good job.... I also put impossible standards on myself, knowing I can't meet them at this point, and get frustrated with myself when, go figure, I don't meet them. I'm kind of dumb sometimes....) I am blessed with some truly fantastic co-workers, and I am beyond grateful for them. I am proud of them. They have been doing so much to make our store work better, and they keep me sane... most of the time ;) I am uberly thankful for them.

I am also thankful for my roommate...roomie...roobie...oobie...oobs... we've gotten lazy and absurd. (no way!) She's a huge support for me, and she never yells at me when I know I'm being dumb. She's just there... like Samwise... and that's pretty neat. I am so thankful for her.

I am thankful for dear friends who randomly visit me at work or come to my apartment.  And for gatherings with cheesecake, tea, and cocoa. Last night, my oobie and I set up our tree while friends were visiting and making merriment. SO good for my little heart. (don't judge too harshly on the Christmas tree...Thanksgiving will be over before we fully enjoy it. We're just eagerly anticipating the Christmas season! And putting some extra beauty in our apartment. everybody needs extra beauty in their lives, yeah? Well, we decided we did.) Anywho, I am thankful for my lovely friends and the merriment they provide.

Think I forgot my family? HECK NO! Because without them I wouldn't be here in the first place. They are my support, my stronghold, my sanity, and my joy. I love my family. Family is just about the most important thing in the world. I love mine. Love them, love them, love them. And I'm so happy to be able to spend today with mine! We're going to chow down on turkey and taters, and all will be right with the world. SO thankful for them.

I am also thankful for my faith, which, admittedly, I take for granted sometimes. I realize it's one of the things that truly keeps me grounded. If not for my faith and all that I've been taught, I dont' know where I'd be. It makes life make sense. So... yeah... thanks for that, God. Thanks for you too, God. I mean, you're pretty neat.. and the source of everything good that I have... that's pretty amazing.

I am wonderfully blessed. Even indirectly. I am so thankful for the soldiers fighting for our country. I am thankful for those serving/taking care of our sick and injured. I am thankful for those who educate our youth (I feel like that makes me sound old, but my baby brother is 8... and also the 'youth' are our future... we need to make sure we give them what they need to continue making a difference). I am thankful for priests and religious. I am thankful for awesome moms and dads. I am thankful for those in food service, for those in retail, and those who volunteer. I am thankful to artists.

I am thankful for YOU.

Because your existence makes this world that much better.

And that's something to be thankful for.

They don't even know you...all they see is scars

My Sixx A.M. kick continues, but this time I'm pulling from their new(er) album. The last track is called "Skin," and I think it's beautiful (go figure).

"'Cause they don't even know you; all they see is scars. They don't see the angel living in your heart. Let them find the real you buried deep within. Let them know with all you've got that you are not your skin."

At first, all I could think of was the people I know who've harmed themselves. I have a friend who never *seriously* harmed herself, but obviously was crying for help... and she was yelled at... and rejected. "It's stupid and selfish to cut yourself. How did that help anything?" I visited her in the hospital and I wasn't sure what to do for her. She knew cutting herself wouldn't change the situation. All she knew was that she *hurt* and she couldn't pinpoint where... so she gave the pain an outlet... a location. 

She got the help she needed, but she still struggles with the faint scars lefts behind. Now she's labeled a "cutter," even though she hasn't harmed herself since her stay in the hospital. All people see are the scars.

This song brought me back to that, and again, all I can think about are our broken. Why is it so much easier to see scars on another and automatically think of the worst of them? Why is it that scars incite fear or negativity and harsh judgement? Why don't they incite *compassion*??? Yes, they represent a terrible action, but behind that action is *pain*. Behind that action is suffering, and illness. Yes, it takes an illness to do such a harm to oneself, but those afflicted are treated as lepers. It agitates me.

When we see friends suffering from some physical ailment, we direct them to a doctor or remedies we've tried to cure it. Why is it harder to do the same if we notice a friend is ailing mentally/emotionally? Is it because we know less about what to do, or that seeking help indicates some sort of "weakness?" What is it? 

Admittedly, I feel somewhat helpless when I know someone is suffering so much. I know that I don't have the capacity within myself to "save" them, but I just pray that whatever love I can give is translated in such a way that it does some good. I can never pretend that I have the answers because I don't. But sometimes it's enough to listen. How often do we even do that? How often do we get irritated listening to someone list their woes because it means nothing to us? What if those woes are crippling that person and they just need an outlet? What if it took all the courage they had to tell you about them?

Just because a person is suffering from depression doesn't mean s/he's weak. They're just *hurt* I think the only weaknesses that exist are sins. Depression isn't a sin. I'm going to stick to that. People will say that depression is selfish, just like self-harm, and suicide. It's not ok, but it's not a sin. It was once the case that those who committed suicide could not have a Christian burial because of the sin of taking a life, but we've realized that one canNOT  be fully be in the correct mindset if they're at such a point. I don't think it's so much that someone suffering from such an affliction can't think of others. There are plenty of people suffering from depression who dearly love their friends and family, and would do anything for them. But that doesn't mean they can just "shake off" the depression. I'd say it's like breaking your wrist and still trying to use it every day- it's painful to the point of distraction. You keep coming back to it.

I feel like all I've been able to talk about is depression, pain, and brokenness, but I guess I'm just tired of (seemingly) no one else caring. I'm surrounded by broken people who I love, and I want them to know they're loved. All advertising is spent anti-depressants. Medication isn't always the answer! As a society, we're so set on band-aids to cover the issue instead of TREATING it. Gah.  

Anyway... A person is more than her scars (or his scars). When we reduce a person to ANY particular point, we lose who s/he essentially is. And that's heartbreaking enough as it is. We're made to be seen... to be known... and to be loved. Even all the broken pieces. It's generally where we find the most incredible and beautiful strengths, anyway. And God knows we're in need of more of that. 

Next time, look for the soul as well as the skin. The skin tells a story, but only a small part, and we don't want to miss out on the person telling that story.

Paint yourself a picture
Of what you wish you looked like
Maybe then they just might
Feel an ounce of your pain

Come into focus
Step out of the shadows
It's a losing battle
There's no need to be ashamed

Cause they don't even know you
All they see is scars
They don't see the angel
Living in your heart

Let them find the real you
Buried deep within
Let them know with all you've got
That you are not your skin

Oh [X2]

When they start to judge you
Show them your true colors
And do onto others
As you'd have done to you

Just rise above this
Kill them with your kindness
Ignorance is blindness
They're the ones that stand to lose

'Cause they don't even know you
All they see is scars
They don't see the angel
Living in your heart

Let them find the real you
Buried deep within
Let them know with all you got
That you are not your skin

OHHHHHHHHHH

Well they don't even know you
All they see is scars
They don't see the angel
Living in your heart

Let them find the real you
Buried deep within
Let them know with all you've got
That you are not
That you are not your skin

I am spoiled.

God makes me laugh. Sometimes I think He's rude (though deep down I know it's just that I either don't like what He has to say or that I don't like how He wants to handle a situation. In the end, I'm the rude one, but I blame Him anyway because I'm charming like that (ha.)), but I know He's always taking care of me. Far beyond anything I deserve.

The past week(s), I've been in a funk, for reasons I can't explain. It's not as though I don't want to talk about it; I  just honestly can't pinpoint the problem. I've just been...off. It's extremely unpleasant. It's much easier for me to deal with my life when I know why I'm upset- I can at least work on processing the emotions and yada yada... But when I'm just overcome with loneliness or oppressive negativity... blech. <-that's how I feel. It's just a big cluster of weirdness and I just want to puke it all out of my system. Immediately. (sorry if that's too graphic.. that's just the best way for me to describe it) But whenever that happens, it just feels too large to actually come out... like somehow whatever is in me has grown past the space its occupying. It's gross. And weird. And incredibly unpleasant.

Anywho, unpleasant gross feelings... Can't get rid of them... I go to work, admit to being tired but overall keep smiling and trying to put on the face of hospitality and joy to keep my people in a good mood. I go home feeling even more gross. I whine to my roomie, but instead of being cathartic, it's just like acknowledging someone I don't like is in the room... just a statement of a fact... bleh.

I decide to have a little chat with Jesus (not that I haven't been talking to Him since the time the grossness began.... just returned for an extra "were you listening when we chatted last?" talk. Because as I said, I'm rude), and I say, "Ok buddy, what's the deal? I'm trying to set this aside but it just keeps pressing on me. I can't ignore this. Um... can you make it go away?"

Next thing I know, I have a couple of the worst days I've had in a LONG time. Not that the events in the day were actually bad. I was just completely overwhelmed. But throughout those couple days, God did not allow me to forget that He loves me.

After Mass, I got a message from a friend I haven't talked to in MONTHS which was basically just one of those, "Hey, just thinking of you, I love you," texts. So. Necessary. And beautiful. Thanks for the love, God.

Two of my friends and their baby made dinner at my apartment, and I felt like a normal human being for a couple of hours. Thanks for the love, God.

My roommate gave me a bracelet that BC was giving out. It says "Be not afraid." I don't know what it means for me yet, but I know I needed it. Thanks for the love, God.

Terrible, horrible day number two, I get a text from a friend with a Bible verse that again tells me, "Be not afraid." Thanks for the love, God.

Another friend of mine sent me a random message, "Hey you're wonderful and I love you." Thanks for the love, God.

Another friend let me vent about my awful feelings and just let me know he was there for me. Thanks for the love, God.

My sister has been sending me random pieces of happiness and stupidity that we both enjoy. Thanks for the love, God.

The next day, better than the two previous: I had a day off. I chopped my hair off. I probably had four cups of Earl Grey, opened the windows, curled up under a blanket, and started reading The Help while listening the rain. My oobie (that's roommate, btw) and I watched a stupid movie and our dear friend came to visit. Thanks for the love, God.

Today I'm alive and well. I know I didn't process anything. I still have no idea what was wrong with me. But I'm ok. And I am loved. Way loved. I will probably still have days of oppressive negativity, but I'm never alone through it. I am truly spoiled. And very loved.

Thanks for the love, God.

ps- You are so very NOT rude.

Could you let down your hair and be transparent for awhile?

"Could you let your hair down and be transparent for awhile, just a little while? Let's see if you're human after all. Honesty is a hard attribute to find when we all seem like we've got it all figured out. Well let me be the first to say that I don't have a clue; I don't have all the answers. Ain't gonna pretend I do... just tryin to find my way..."

The song "Trying" by Lifehouse is beautiful. If you haven't heard it, you should listen to it. I'm biased... they're my favorite band.. but they also speak very clearly to authentic love and the strength of the human spirit... I love them.

In any case, I was thinking about this because I was having a chat with a friend about trust and masks we sometimes wear. How often do we show our true face to the people around us?

I know it can be terrifying to be ourselves with another. We're broken, and we continually let each other down. Even knowing we're capable and guilty of the same sin, when others let us down, it becomes so much harder to continue to let ourselves be vulnerable. At least it is for me. There are times I throw my hands in the air and say, "That's it! I'm done with people. I won't let anyone in again." Then I realize that's stupid. JPII (beautiful man that he was) said, "Man only finds himself when making a sincere gift of himself," (the quote may not be entirely correct, but the sentiment definitely is). When I am so concerned with finding the woman I am meant to be and what path I am meant to travel, I cannot ignore this. The only way for me to be truly myself is to give of myself. Which entails making myself vulnerable. Terrifying! But necessary. And wonderful.

I still need to makes sure I am not careless with my heart, however. Where is the balance??

"Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life." -Proverbs 4:23

To guard is to keep safe and protect. This does not mean, "lock it away from sight." Our hearts are treasures, "the WELLSPRING OF LIFE," needing protection so as not to be destroyed, but it is only used for its intended purpose when given away. So we've got to do what we can to make them strong. We have to learn to love ourselves. We have to learn to see ourselves through God's eyes. We have to surround ourselves with faithful allies who care about the condition of the treasure we contain. They will fight to protect it. Even when they fall, they have made the effort. We have to seek the good and pursue it. Our hearts delight in that and grow ever stronger. We need to let the love in our hearts be seen and be given. It's funny how much giving of ourselves really does help us to gain infinitely more.

The thing is, our hearts were made to LOVE. "Oh God, our hearts are restless until they rest in you." -St. Augustine. Guess what? God is LOVE. Doesn't it make sense that our hearts are strongest and most at peace when they imitate their Creator?

Anyway...I'm exhausted and rambling. Let down your hair and be transparent for a while. Let others see the treasure of your heart and inspire theirs.

Love is louder... Than anything

Today I stumbled across Love is Louder. Like To Write Love on Her Arms, they're an organization that seeks love for the person.

I fell in love.

Again, it is beautiful to come across movements to "spread the love." The world *aches* for it. You ache for it. I know I certainly ache for it. It. is. so. necessary.

We're meant to be known and seen and loved. Because we're created by Love for Love.

I think of all the little ways we can love each other...from simple acts of service, a hug, a smile, words of encouragement, etc. These things seems so small... and they have the greatest impact. For many, that "simple" smile can make the day worth living.

Pain can be suffocating. It can be be overwhelming. Sometimes it can seem like the only voice left.

But love is still louder.

Love endured the pain of death on a cross that we might have life. And our life has purpose, Every life has purpose. We best fulfill it by loving. LOVING. It's foreign to our society of selfishness, but it's more inherent to our nature, just as goodness is. We've simply made a habit of being selfish. Why do we ever think it's a good idea? And why does it sometimes seem so much easier than to love our neighbor? Isn't the work the greatest reward? Perhaps it's just that we've forgotten.

Despite any of our selfishness, however, the call to love continues to crop up. The recognition of its necessity continues to show its face (ha). That should be proof enough. Love is louder.

It's funny how God shows His face sometimes. He always does in the ways His children need. What we need now aren't awesome signs and wonders...we need Love. Or maybe it's just that, with the turn society has taken, the awesome signs and wonders are the small ones. Because they are so stifled. As the hands and feet of Love, however, we've gotta bring it to the streets. We need to bring it to our neighbors, our friends, and even the ones we have a hard time getting along with. Maybe you're the one to show them love is louder than the pain they harbor.

Love is louder than the pressure to be perfect.
It is louder than the insecurities we feel.
It is louder than the numbers on the scale.
It is louder than the scars on our bodies.
It is louder than our shortcomings.
Love is louder than hate. (how else would it resonate so much more deeply within us??)
It is louder than prejudices.
It is louder than the differences between us.
It is louder than unkind words and actions.
Love is louder than loneliness.
It is louder than darkness.
It is louder than bullying.
It is louder than persecution.
Love is louder than the voice that says, "You can't."
Love is louder than the voice that says, "You aren't strong enough."
Love is louder than the voice that says, "You. Aren't. Enough."
Love is louder. Than anything.

This is not to say that the pain people experience isn't legitimate. Of course it's legitimate. We live in a broken world full of broken and broken-hearted people. However, Love can heal it. It's the only thing that can. And when the voices that scream, "You are worthless," "You are alone," and, "Give up!" (even when they come from within), are overpowering, we need to speak Love. Small and simple random acts of kindness speak more loudly than we can even fathom.

Speak Love.

Love is louder.

I would give my final breath to make you understand how beautiful you are

Beauty is one of the only things in the world that makes sense to me.  I literally cannot imagine life without it- I believe we all would go insane. That being said, I also believe it would be impossible for beauty to not exist while goodness does. But I digress...

Since beauty is one of the only things that makes sense to me, I seek it out. Amazingly enough, I see it everywhere, especially in every person I meet. (I may not see it right away. When my only experience with a person is not a pleasant one, it makes it a bit more difficult, but the fact of the matter is, no matter what their disposition, the fact that they exist is a testament to the goodness and beauty within them, even when I don't see it manifested.) Beauty is abundant, and it is overwhelmingly necessary.

What breaks my heart is, when beauty is so evident in each person, it is overlooked, forgotten, dismissed, and believed to be nonexistent. Grr.

Again, I speak on the views of society, success, and silly expectations we place on ourselves...

Society's view of beauty is so skewed... it pains me. It is said that beauty is in the eye of the beholder... and society needs to get its checked.

Beauty is in everything good and true. It is in the gifts we possess. It is in a smile. Laughter. The color of our eyes. The way we love, be it through hugs or simply listening to another tell their story. Beauty is even in the way we react to our situation because that speaks intimately to who we are. Beauty is in all the broken places.

Why is it so hard to see that?

Why is it so hard for people to see their own beauty? Why is it so hard to see how necessary they are?

I cannot say that I am not guilty of this. For all that I love others, I do not always see the goodness in myself, or if I do see it, I feel as though it is not enough. Who I'm making these expectations for? I'm not entirely sure. In some sense, I guess they're for me, as I desperately want to meet them, but in another entirely, I feel as though I've placed them on myself for the benefit of someone else... I don't entirely think it's for God's sake, as I know He loves me as I am... not that I don't want to be a better person, as I'm called to be.. It's a complicated state, I guess. In any case, I place expectations on myself that I cannot meet, I put walls up because I don't want others to see that I can't meet these expectations, and in the end, I lose sight of who I am and what I actually have to offer.

Which is lame because I would never do that to another person.

I would never place impossible expectations on another. So why on earth do I do that to myself? Am I really so hellbent on assuring myself that I am unlovable? That's absurd. But then I wonder if it's the same for so many others.

We live in an age where addiction, depression, self-harm, and suicide are far too common. There is an overwhelming trend of loneliness and worthlessness that has seeped into the hearts of the people... my friends and neighbors... your friends and neighbors... in the people you might not expect because they keep such a brave face. every. day.

When I come to face the magnitude of the issue, my own heart is overwhelmed. It hurts. I want to take each hurting heart and speak to it directly: You are beautiful. You are necessary. And. You. Are. So. Loved.

Maybe it sounds a little cliche. Maybe it sounds a little naive. But there you have it. Because, despite however it may sound, it remains true. I love people. I love beauty. And it just so happens that the two are inseparable.  I still cannot fathom what I am going to do for the rest of my life in terms of a "job," but I can say with certainty that my vocation is to love. I know I cannot reach everyone I wish to, but I will do my best. Every day. Even if it's only through trying to offer a hug or a smile, I'll do my best to love. I'll also do my best to support organizations who love the heart as I do. Because they can reach the ones I can't. (Love for TWLOHA!)

Dear reader,
You are amazing.
Whether or not they are known to me, you have gifts that are meant to be shared.
You have a heart that is so strong, even the times it feels weak.
You have a smile unlike anyone else's.
You are beautiful. So beautiful.
You are necessary.
And you are loved. Beyond belief.
Love,
Amanda

Oo oo, oo oo, I love your every coloor...

I love your every color... it's a song by Train, and it makes my heart smile every time I hear it. Train is great about authentic and beautiful love songs.

This song speaks to me especially because I long to be a woman of color. I long to be someone who's vibrant and alive and someone who shows that in varying hues. It's why I love peacocks so much, I think. It's why I'm drawn to bright and beautiful colors... I *want* that. In me. Pouring out of my soul through my speech, my touch, my eyes, whatever. I want to show the colors of peace and joy and love. I want to show the color of empathy, of compassion, and mercy.

What also strikes me about the song is that he says I love your EVERY color. Even the dark ones... Love, if it is truly love, can only love all the more when faced with dark-colored imperfections. Afterall, aren't shadows the evidence that there is light? I know I have many faults and shortcomings... but aren't they contrasted by the goodness in me?

Right now I'm quite the mess of color, a bit chaotic... the picture isn't quite clear yet. But I'm working on throwing on layer and layer of light and color until the image that remains is one that I want to see... that woman of vibrant color. Many colors. And while there will be some shadows that linger, I hope to be surrounded by those who will love every last color I reveal and to someday be one who's color "is on the brink of changing all the ways [I] see the world."

(This song is so beautiful!! Think about it. Someday...)

I can see the red, white and free in you
You light the night up like the moon
And underneath your clouds, I see the blue

You're hopeless 'cause you tell the truth
The stars are jealous of your shine
If you were mine
There's not a thing I wouldn't do

You're black and beautiful, yellow, tan
You're white as light and soft as sand
With greens and greys and oh for days
A silver lining on the way you cover everyone
Just like a morning sun
You turn me into someone I would rather be

OOO- I love your every color
OOO- I love your everything
You wear the day around you
Like it's yours to stay around you
Maybe I could stay around you too
If that's alright with you

You're coffee brown and bubble gum pink
And oh I think the shade of you is on the brink
Of changing all the ways I see the world
I could drown inside a single drop
Of all the kinds of things you got
And all the kinds of things I'm not

Might just give me a chance to see
From way up where you are
Above the silent stars
Just dancing in the sky

You're better than any rainbow
You're brighter than the sun
You look like my first day of summer
When my spring is on the run
You're gold and more gold
And you're platinum too
With snow toned, copper attitude
I don't know what I'd do without you
I don't know what I'll do about you