Tell me your story, show me your wounds, and I'll show you what Love sees when Love looks at you

I've had some conversations lately that have gotten me to think about love... and again I can only say that it's the only thing that makes life make sense to me.

It kills me when people believe they are unworthy of love. I mean, I get it. There are times that I feel that way myself. But that's heartbreaking. There is not a single person that is unworthy of love. No matter what they've done or what they didn't do, no matter where they've been. Everyone deserves love. Every. One. 

We live believing we need to hide our flaws, our brokenness, our tragedies, our missteps... and all that does is build up walls around who we are... it keeps us from being truly known. Granted, it's terrifying to be vulnerable, as we run the risk of being rejected and hurt some more, but there's also the opportunity to be loved for who. we. are. 

I feel like a hypocrite, because there are some things I definitely don't want other people to know about me... I'm just as flawed as anyone else. I get angry, I'm selfish, I'm absurd, and I make stupid decisions sometimes. And I forget to forgive myself for being broken. I sometimes forget that my mistakes, no matter what they may be, are never enough to warrant me undeserving of love. I'm dumb. I get it. But just as much as I don't see it for myself, I can see it for others. I hear someone mention feeling inadequate, unworthy, broken, etc., and I just want to take them in my arms and transfer the knowledge that they are so. beautiful. and lovable straight into their hearts. I know I can't fix anything, but I want them to see what I can see in them. I want them to be able to see the beauty of their soul. I want to hear their stories and show them they are loved anyway. I want to show them they are worthy of happiness, that they deserve goodness.

Sometimes I wonder... what exactly does Love Himself see? If I'm allowed to see such beauty and goodness with my broken capacity to love, how much more beautiful is God's vision of our broken selves? And how much more heartbreaking is it to see such stunning children disbelieve their own worth?

In any case, no matter where you have been, no matter what you have done, no matter what gifts you don't possess and others do, no matter what your flaws may be: you are beautiful and worthy of love. You. Are. Loved.

When you walk upon thin ice that you know you should not be walking, why do you wonder why that you fell through?

Forget about the fight to wear the crown of scars
Cause you've already won.
Forget the pain and leave the tears behind you.
Bury underneath your feet the remains
Of what's been left behind,
Cause you've got a long, a long way to run

But now you dance the rest of the way
And you don't look back
Can you hear the angel singing
As you rise?

Now you can fly away
And you don't look down now
And you laugh until you can't laugh any longer
As you watch your chains fall to the ground.

When you fall against the wall that you have built with your own hands
When you trip upon the thorns that you have tied your legs together with
When you walk upon the ice that you know you should not be walking
Why do you wonder why you fell through?

Now you fly away
And you don't look down now
And you laugh until you can't laugh any longer
As you watch your chains fall to the ground

And now you laugh
And your tears
Smile down at your fears
From where you are
From way up here
You know nothing's ever looked so good
Nothing ever looked so good

But now you dance the rest of the way
You don't look back
Can you hear the angel singing
As you rise
Now you fly away
And you don't look down now
And you laugh until you can't laugh any longer
As you watch your chains fall to the ground


^"Crown of Scars" by Lifehouse. It's a wonderful song. I also think it's very powerful. For me, it reminds me to quit focusing on a lot of my issues, or at least step back and take a look at them. How many times do I have problems because of something that I caused? How many times do I know something isn't the best idea or what's best for me and then get frustrated because things turned out poorly? How many times do I fight to keep saying that I'm hurt instead of walking forward anyway? Wounded though I may be at times, I still need to find within myself the strength to go somewhere to be mended. I can't just sit there and whine about how much whatever it is hurts, etc. 


"Forget about the fight to wear the crown of scars, cause you've already won...bury underneath your feet the remains of what's been left behind 'cause you have got a long, long way to run." Sometimes I think we feel we need to have it recognized that we've been wronged, or we're hurt. But sometimes it's enough to know it for ourselves... at least it needs to be enough that we know it for ourselves. There are times it seems we'll never find justice in a situation, and that's ok. Seek mercy instead! Yes, the crown of scars has been placed upon your head, but it's not the end. Life doesn't end with scars, and neither should our story. Why should we put everything on hold for pain? We need to keep moving.

That's not to say it's easy, especially when we make it a habit to seek justice for our pain or we prefer to be stagnant. Fear is also extremely crippling. BUT, when we start again, when we start to move forward, seeking the good for ourselves and those we encounter, the scars have a tendency to fade.  We become stronger, and we lose the chains that have bound us, even the ones we put on ourselves.

Anyway... that's my random evening rant. Happy Gaudete Sunday! (it's one of my favorites!) Find a little joy in what's left of your day, or recognize it from earlier :) Find joy in your own existence, as it is truly beautiful.